See Past Your Beliefs

Did you know that there was a time when every person on the planet thought that the world was flat? That is you travelled to the end of the Earth, you would fall off the edge? Until Christopher Columbus proved otherwise, this was the common belief. He believed that if you did sail to 'the edge' you wouldn't fall off, but instead end up sailing back to where you started.

When Christopher Columbus declared that the world was round and not flat, no one believed what seemed like an utterly ridiculous statement because no ship had yet sailed to 'the edge' to prove his point. So why should they believe him? What proof did he have? History now records that Columbus not only broke one of the most widely held beliefs ever entertained by humans, and discovered another world in the process.

Or perhaps consider the Ancient Romans and Greeks, who tried for centuries to break the barrier of the four-minute mile. No one had ever run the mile in less than four minutes. It couldn't be done. They declared it 'humanely impossible'. The Romans even went so far as to have lions chase men to see if this would give them some extra motivation to move faster. Sadly for the human guinea pigs, this did not work or end so well.

The four minute barrier remained unbroken until Englishman named Roger Bannister decided he was going to do it. Bannister smashed the 'unbreakable' when on 6th May, 1954 when he ran the mile in 3 minutes 59.6 seconds. He was hailed as a hero and later received a knighthood. Whilst the breaking of the record was a fantastic feat, the reason I share this story with you is to tell you what happened afterwards, which is what I find even more fascinating.

After centuries of people trying to break the 'unbreakable' four-minute mile mark, as soon as one person proved it was possible, suddenly it became achievable for many. Over the next four years, more than forty people ran the mile in less than four minutes. The 'unbreakable' was not being broken quite regularly. Why? Because the belief had been changed: 'You can now run the mile in less than four minutes'. Permission granted!

As these two famous instances of belief-breaking show, what you believe you can do can severly hamper your progress at work and in your personal life - or it can help you to reach amazing goals.

In my next post, I'll explore some of the limiting beliefs we all face in our everyday lives, and what we can do to make sure they don't hold us back from pushing boundaries and being our very best.

Feel Good - Walk Tall, Shower & Laugh It Up!

As we lead into what promises to be another crazed, not-at-all relaxing weekend in the midst of silly season, I thought I would send you on your merry way with a couple of tips to feel good. Simple things to improve your outlook on life!

TIP ONE: WALK TALL

Stop comparing yourself with other people to your own detriment. However wonderful others may seem compared to you, be assured that every great looking person knows that there is always someone more attractive than them, or that they don't have the greatness inside them to back their looks up.

Instead of putting yourself down, look up to yourself. Remember, real joy comes from within. YOU are a complete original, and happiness comes from accepting yourself as you are.

TIP TWO: SHOWER THE BLUES AWAY

Get your weekend day off to a happy start with an uplifting wake-up shower. Try alternating blasts of cold and hot water - it will kick start your metabolism and boost your circulation, encouraging oxygen-rich blood to reach every tissue of your body. If you are musical, don't be afraid to bust out a tune whilst you are in there. Soak up the awesome acoustics that is your bathroom. If your housemates complain, feel free to blame me! I can take it!

To continue the feel-good feeling, pat yourself dry with a thick, fluffy towel and moisturise your skin from head to toe. Guys - this may sound odd to you, but hydrated skin is healthy skin - and ladies like touchable skin! Then slap on your favourite perfume or cologne. It doesn't matter if you aren't going anywhere special - treat yourself to your favourite scent - just because you are awesome!

TIP THREE: HAVE A GOOD LAUGH

Three minutes of good, hearty, rip-roaring laughter can be as beneficial to your body as ten minutes of hard aerobic exercise. It deepens your breathing, lifts your endorphin levels (the body's own feel-good hormones) and protects you against depression. Many people comment that I am the happiest person they now - and a big part of that is because I laugh regularly, and I laugh hard!

So if you want to feel happy and bubbly too, get those laughter hormones going - see a funny film, read a funny book, think back to a funny occasion, call a funny friend - and have a really good chuckle. Giggling also gives facial muscles a good workout and will make everyone around you feel better too. Guys - yes I mean you too. There is nothing funnier than a grown man crying. Click here for one of the funniest moments of 2011. (about 2:20 in if you are in a hurry)

Have a happy weekend all!

The Art of the Two-Minute Pickup

Now before you get too excited, when I say two-minute pickup, I don't mean I can help you get a date or a phone number in less than one hundred and twenty seconds. Though I have pulled that mean feat off a few times.

What I am talking about, is a quick two-minute solution, that if used a few times a day, can help you get on top of the madness that is your everyday life.

What do you do on days when you are especially rushed? If you are like me and many others, you double your speed, you skim from one event to the next, and you take shortcuts. But ask yourself... does it really work?

Sometimes yes, but in the long term it actually creates more problems. Why you ask? Because it generally leaves a trail of unfinished tasks lingering behind you, including dozens of 'quick' emails and voice messages to return, half-opened mail and a bunch of to-dos to follow up on, all of which nibble at your peace of mind.

So let me introduce you to the art of the two-minute pickup. Two-minute pickups are tasks that are too short to write on a to-do list but that slow the pace of your life when they are ignored too long.

Here are a few two-minute solutions to help you save time at home:

• Load the dishwasher as soon as the meal is done.
• Water a plant as you come in the door.
• Pay a bill as soon as you read it.
• Renew a prescription as soon as you realise it is coming up.
• RSVP to an event when the invite comes in.
• Program a mobile number into your phone.
• Create an email mailing list for a group you regularly contact.
• Fold the laundry as it comes out of the dryer or off the line.

Do a few of these each day, and you just may save enough time to sit down for a cup of coffee and watch the sun set! A two-minute solution for a recurring task saves ten minutes every time thereafter. You could save five hours a month or sixty hours in one year - all in exchange for a short two-minute investment.

Simple right? Give it a try. What two-minute pick up are you going to master today?

'Get' Yourself

Do you 'get' you?

Do you get how great you really are?

As soon as you do, you are instantly bigger, taller, brighter, more full of yourself. I'm not talking about being conceited, I'm talking about having a healthly level of self-confidence. Giving yourself a bit of an ego boost and revelling in the awesomeness that is you.

I want you to make a list titled 'Reasons to feel immensely proud of myself'. Jot down three things that come to mind immediately. This list tells you how brilliant you already are, how clever, how accomplished, how downright brilliant. Unless you appreciate your worth and value in this way, it is hard for you to use it or make it work for you.

Think of it this way, it is like you have banked all these riches without making them grow or even buy anything useful. Go on. Impress yourself. Have a metaphorical growth spurt in less than five minutes. In our busy lives, especially at this busy time of year, it is easy to lose sight of who you are.

The key to more power is to appreciate your own value. Look at your list. I want you to make this list so good, so thorough that you swell with pride at the sight of yourself laid bare. Fill yourself up with respect. Rise up in your own estimation. Focus on that list every evening for a week. Slowly but surely, you will grow in stature each and every day.

Get into the habit of regular appreciation and admiration for yourself. I promise you, this isn't an indulgence. It is a way of looking at yourself that gives you access to your own power base. The stronger you are within, the more it shows on the outside. Your power and poise should be written all over you.

You are fabulous.

Go 'get' you!

A Poetic Take On Teamwork

At work today, I was supposed to have my final day of training. But as my trainer was sick, I got thrown in the deep end working on enrolments flat out all morning. It was interesting work as part of a different department's team and seeing how they dealt with stress throughout the morning, especially when the computers crashed and threw the enrolment system into disarray - not a great way to start the morning when you have hundreds of parents with their little children lining up and waiting!

All in all, it was handled quite well and I enjoyed being part of the busy rush. On my way home, I recalled a poem I once memorised. I can't remember why I learned it or who wrote it, but the words stuck with me just the same.

TEAM

What does it mean to be part of a team,

working with others, sharing a dream?

What can you gain by playing this way,

as part of a group, not only your way?

You learn how to give and how to fit in,

that helping each other is the best way to win.

You learn how to trust and to be counted on.

No matter the outcome, you aren't alone.

You learn to encourage when confidence lacks

and how to accept a friend's pat on the back.

And when things get tough, when troubles begin,

you all hang together through thick and through thin.

What do you learn when you play as a team?

You learn about life and what true friendship means!

Simple - but true! Did you find yourself nodding at some of those lines, and sighing at others? The ones that you sighed at - have a look at ways that you might be able to turn those sighs into nods the next time you are in a team situation.

Where Did These Attitudes Come From?

Following on from my last post about what makes your bad habits tick, today I will look at the mentality behind each of the attitudes listed, and a simple suggestion on where to start looking and reflecting about yourself, so that you can deal with the cause, and start opening yourself up to the possibility of healthy changes.

'I'm the way I am, and that's that.'

On the surface, this might seem like a very convenient attitude. You will not have to change, and others can either like it or leave it. It could end up making you a lonely person though, if others decide they would rather leave it than put up with it.

Start thinking about where you have learnt to believe that change is impossible, and then open your mind about it.

'I'm probably too stupid to change my habit.'

'Nothing I do can ever be good enough.'

'My self-criticisms are mostly justified.'

Each of these attitudes are learnt responses. No child thinks that they are too stupid, without first having been told or shown that they are not good enough.

Start thinking about the origins of your self-criticism. At what point did you learn to believe that you are not good enough?

'It's self indulgent to want to be happier.'

There is no point in constantly bemoaning your fate. That does not mean it is self-indulgent to look at and change what is making you unhappy in life. Your own happiness should be all-important if you want to make others happy, so working on your own contentment is actually very altruistic.

Start thinking about where you learnt to believe that your feelings do not count.

'Life is hard.'

'I am an unlucky person. Always have been. Always will be.'

'There's no point in me trying to change anything. It won't make a difference.'

These are all sweeping statements that often lack observation. Chances are when you look at your life, you will be able to find memories of times when life was easier and when things went well for you.

Start thinking where it was that you learnt to believe that you have no control over your life.

'I need to be hard on myself or I won't do anything right.'

'If I can only change by getting someone to help me, it doesn't count.'

Where does this regime of self-punishement come from? It is likely a learnt behaviour of over-strict parents, teachers or other adults. Alternatively, it may also be the consequence of a past failure or shortcoming.

Start thinking where you learnt to believe that you need to make up for a past failure or shortcoming.

'I'm too frightened to consider changing myself and my habits.'

Fears can be based on facts or they can exist only in your mind. If you were shouted down the last time you uttered a dissenting view to your partner, that is a fact. If you are afraid you left the iron on and check it numerous times before you leave the house every day, then your fear is irrational.

Start thinking whether or not there is a factual basis to your fear.

'When others give me a hard time, it's because I deserve it.'

'Other people can change, but I can't.'

Where does this glorification of others come from? Why are others better than you? Why are they always right? This is a child's belief in which adults are high up on a pedestal. Remember thought, that the great are only great because we are on our knees.

Start thinking about what fears stop you from taking charge of your life.

'I don't deserve to be happier.'

If all the other statements are unhelpful, this one is the biggest and most destructive one. It comes from a sense of deep self-loathing and possibly depression.

Start thinking where you learnt to believe so strongly that you are worthless.

You may notice that the 'start thinking' advice askes you to reflect on where you learnt to believe a particular thing. This is because many of the beliefs we hold today about ourselves or the world around us were initiated by past experiences, sometimes going back as far as childhood.

No matter where the origins of your problematic habit lie, you will benefit from first identifiying the cause and then from developing new personal resources. These can help you change the detrimental petterns that were established through an emotional link with past events or present unhappy relationships or circumstances.